Short post!

I’m tweeting one liners. Because if I posted five times a day here, I’m sure someone would punch me in the butthole. Come follow me on Twitter, too! Here:

Here are some:

When I was a drunk, I used to dream about being a stand-up comedian. But I couldn’t stand up. I also couldn’t comedian.


Sobriety is such a blessing. I have so many more friends now that I’m fully present and don’t puke chunks all over their weaves.


Now that I’m sober, I love going to church on Sunday. And by church, I mean the frozen yogurt shop.

Today is 100 days. 10 days ago was 90 days. I’m not sure which one is more important? I mean. I know they both are. Every day is important. But the number 100 seems so fancy. How many days do you have? Even 1 is amazing. Because this monster really wants us drunk and in a gutter forever. So celebrate every moment without the motherfucking bullshit. And it WAS motherfucking bullshit. All of it.

People have been asking about my teeth. They’re okay. Still there. I have to go back Monday for some shitty oral surgery. I’ll update and reflect once they are done destroying my face. Trying to stay calm and definitely not drinking over it.

Go hump your hearts out, sober people! Happy Wednesday!


  1. I have exact 7 days/one week today! This is big for me. Haven’t made it a week in a looooong while! I’m gunning for 30 days so I can get my chip at AA. Seems like an insurmountable goal at the moment but I just keep chanting “I think I can, I think I can!” haha! 🙂 MAJOR KUDOS on 100 days…damn…that’s huge!!!

  2. 100 days – that’s amazing!! One day at a time. I’ve got 52 days and it’s so fucking crazy to think I have almost two months. Also: you need to post more so that horrible toothless Amy Poehler gets moved off the page. It’s giving me nightmares. AND if you hate your dentist, then go to Dr. Padukone on W. 72nd Street. He is the NICEST DENTIST EVER.

  3. 23 days here. I personally think day 1 was the hardest. Can’t wait to see 100 like you. Congrats!!!!

  4. 115 days. My experience day 1-30 was really hard. Went by very slow. 30-60 not as hard for cravings. Lots of anger. Soul searching. If you can try to get lots of rest during this time. Go to bed early. Read books and blogs. 60-90. Lots of sadness about not having fun, pangs in the heart when friends posted anything about wine or wine tasting, having cocktails, etc. 90 to 115. Starting to come into the light, a diligent time, preparing to be social and not drink, 2 weddings and a party. Sober. Vegas coming up on August 1. Preparing for that. Plenty of AF drinks planned. Doing stuff other than gambling. Lots of good food planned.Dessert rewards. You can all do it!!!!

    1. Great reflection! I’m on day 108 and have gone through a lot if the same emotions! Great job…enjoy Vegas!

    1. I need to run over to your blog today to catch up, my dear. What is going on? How are you? I’ve been back and forth to the dentist and doctor and just had my surgery yesterday and feel like I’ve lost the thread. Did you go to mom’s yet? 235 days is so huge. That needs protecting! I know you know that. XO

  5. 100 Days! That’s wonderful – congrats! I am at Day 72. I remember when you were at 30 days and I was just a few days into this endeavor. You were and still are so inspiring!

  6. Congrats on 100 John! It’s a most excellent number. Consider it a BIG bill in your wallet of sobriety. Not sure where the hell that analogy came from. It’s late. Day 190 for me. Here’s to starting sobriety on the 15th of the month.
    Hugs…Another Kristin

  7. Congrats to all! Personally, I think that anything over one day is a reason to be proud…many people cannot & will not commit to not drinking, but it shows that we have the ” guts” to improve our lives & stop the madness! Never in a million years would I have thought that I could stop for even one day….but the days DO get easier & oh so much lovlier 🙂 To this date I’ve proudly stopped for 1117 days in a row– One day at a time!

  8. Yah, John!!! Congrats on 100 days! Such an awesome accomplishment. I’m on day 62! There have been ups and downs but the downs are never as bad as the dumps we felt when drinking.

    Awesome accomplishment. Reason to celebrate with a decadent dessert. 🙂

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s